In too many homes across America children are wondering where he is. Physically he is in the home, but that is where it ends. The rest of him is preoccupied with other things, "more important things," such as work, hobbies, sports, TV, reading (which was my passion) or any number of things. This man never seems to have enough time. Between work and "his interests" there isn't any time left for anyone else. All the household responsibilities are dumped on his wife. In the raising of the children, he's too busy. All the important decisions now must be made by the wife. All the rearing, discipline and spiritual teaching also must be handled by the wife. After a while the children will stop asking for their dad. Why should they ask for him? He never has the time.

Children in homes like these all too often grow up to be dysfunctional adults. The young women don't know what they should be looking for in a man, never having seen an example in the home. Young boys, on the other hand, don't have any idea of what it means to be a good husband and father. Who's responsible? Why, the man of course. He is to be the leader in his home. If his home is a failure, then he must take the blame.

Gentlemen, whether we believe God ordained it or whether we simply follow thousands of years of tradition, we are to be the heads of our households. If we abdicate this responsibility to our wives, we are creating serious problems for every member of the family. We can have a wife who is bitter about not only having to handle her own responsibilities but also her husband's. That wife will have little or no respect for him as a man.

Children having no real male figure in the home may look for one on the outside, sometimes with dire consequences. And, last but not least, the man never fully grows, because he never shouldered the responsibilities that were rightfully his. Sometimes when his wife may have to make a decision that he doesn't agree with, he says she is usurping his authority. Where was he for all the many decisions that had to be made when he was too busy?

We men have to put a stop to this. We have put aside our selfish ways and devote ourselves to our families. We must do more than just work and bring home a paycheck. Providing for those we love is just one of our many duties. We need to take an active role in managing the finances. We must also be the barriers that separate our family from all the dangers that plague the society we live in. We must alleviate our wives of all unnecessary worries by taking them upon ourselves. We must teach our children the skills they will need to be good wives and husbands. We must take the lead in instructing our wives and our children in matters of spirituality.